Skyrim Adventures: The Black Hand

So I've been playing alot of Skyrim and watching ALOT of Lord of the Rings/The Hobbit, and I look at the Dark Brotherhood's logo. The Black hand. All of a sudden, I hear the Isengard them play. (I had two TVs on. One with Skyrim, other with lotr) And I gasp! The White Hand of Saruman! So the Black hand must be for... Bizzarro-Saruman! Mansaru the Black! A massive black-robed Balrog with a flaming beard wielding a large white staff. He's too dumb to speak correctly and can't cast magic, but he doesn't need it as he can easily beat anyone to death in seconds! With the staff! ...or fist, or tail, feet, horns, beard, a table... etc. He can't write, so makes his followers do it before scorching their hands and slamming them repeatedly on the paper until he's content with the look of the handprint! He doesn't afraid of anything and once punched Sauron in the face for the crime of breathing before diving into Mount Doom on the back of Ungoliant! ...While air-guitaring all the way down into the molten lava, screaming every curse he knew at it (Gwar) before being incinerated... slowly! He didn't really die until the moment the One Ring hit the lava! In fact, it wasn't the ring that triggered that! It was his death that destroyed the mountain! In fact, the ring's deastruction didn't kill Sauron! His great eye caught a glimpse of Mansaru flipping him off before his passing, so he had a massive fear-induced heart-attack, causing his very soul to explode, destroying all of Mordor! The gods were so proud of such an awesome death that they rose Mansaru into the heavens and renamed him Sithis! PRAISE SITHIS!!!

...Oh. Sorry about my rambling. Anyways, what shall become of Cerberus? Will he join the Dark Brotherhood, or kill them? ...except Babette. She's still the coolest daughter ever.